One day Bob awoke to the sound of loud farts. Whoa, he said how strange. It only got stranger too. Toddlers dressed up like prostitutes dropped out of the sky with parachutes. They had a lot of gold and only spoke some obscure Alaskan Native American language. They also brought miniature pigs. Little squealers they were called. Best damn suckers around. Why hell, those little guys brought joy to everyone. Even old man butt savage. He had stories for days about all his favorite animals he had loved. Loved so very very much, if you know what I'm sayin'. He had a farm where he grew scarecrows. You see scarecrows start out as baby scarecrows and grow p to scare, well, you know, crows. They stand out there for weeks and not get plum-tuckered. Then the speed wore off, life was shit and so many poor animals were brutally raped to death but at least Bush was dead too.

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Cadavre Exquis

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